San Francisco Adds Alcohol to its Dietary Guidelines (Sort of...)

(Policy Brief)

There’s an episode of ‘The Simpsons’ where the titular family’s hometown of Springfield bans alcohol, following the discovery of a previously undisclosed 200-year-old prohibition law. Hilarity and hijinks ensue as the characters navigate the consequences of their town run dry. Eventually, everyone decides they want their alcohol back, which conveniently coincides with another discovery; a repeal of the original prohibition law which was passed… 199 years ago (proving that legislative bodies can in fact, get things done quickly). The closing line of the episode is delivered by Homer Simpson, standing on barrels before a crowd, who hoists a glass of beer and says, “To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems”.

That closing tribute captures a fairly twisted point about the nature of alcohol. It does in fact cause many problems in life, but by nature of its neuro-depressant qualities, you may either forget or cease to care about said problems, at least until you sober up again. Most people know this, even the addicts. Which is why it’s so strange to learn that city officials in San Francisco now permit use of alcohol as a treatment measure for alcoholism. The story generated lots of criticism, with a few proponents defending the practice as a life-saving measure that also preserves city resources. But the available evidence tells a different story, and it’s not comical. While this entire premise once made for good satire or tongue-in-cheek Substack headlines, the reality is much more painful.